Hi everyone!! I hope you all had a fabulous weekend. Here, we got slammed with a snowstorm or blizzard. Whatever you would like to call it. I indulged in myself by painting my nails, and lounging in a pair of leggings and a hoodie. 🙂
I have been thinking a lot lately about gratitude. At the beginning of this year, even though I wasn’t blogging, I wrote down three things I was thankful for every day during the month of January. It was something I did for myself to bring a more positive attitude to my life. (Not that I was ever overly negative, but as a reminder to myself.) I think this coming year I will be doing the same. Before I do, I wanted to write out a few things and sort my thoughts.
Lessons In Life
These last ten years have been HARD! Who am I kidding though, if you ask anyone, they would probably all say the same. There is nothing that is truly easy about this crazy thing we call life. All of our stories are different, and that is what makes us all so unique. I, myself, have navigated the struggles of single parenthood, been in and out of (a couple) abusive relationships, relapsed from eating disorders, recovered, lived in a couple different states, lost a parent, and here I am today to tell all of you about it. It’s also very important for me to remember, that although there has been a lot of negative in my life there has been so much good! Now I am nearing the end of my Don’t Drink In December Challenge and considering going on to 100 days alcohol free.
**You guys have been so supportive and absolutely amazing! I have to thank you!
I think the biggest lesson I have learned about EVERYTHING that I have been through is that you can’t ever give up, and you have to WORK for everything you want and have. If you want to know anything about me, know that I am a very strong willed person. Also, I strongly believe in a couple different things:
- Everything happens for a reason.
- You are not entitled to anything
- Your life is what YOU make of it.
- You can’t control everything, or the people around you, but you damn sure can control how you respond to it. Someone knock you down? Good. Get your arse back up and show them you won’t take it! (Hence getting out of abusive relationships, and moving on to bigger and better things)
There have been a couple of times over the last few years, that I have gotten frustrated with not having much money left over at the end of the pay period. So we are limited on what we can do outside of work. I was also starting to feel really bad this year for Christmas because I felt that we didn’t have a whole lot to give. Or so I thought that anyway. Looking back, I think everyone had a pretty great Christmas. Even if some of the people on my list just got handmade gifts.
Not long after those thoughts entered my head, I immediately looked around and had some very humbling moments. I don’t have a lot of money left over, but we do have a home, all of the bills are paid and we have food. We also have a lot more than what a lot of other people have. In fact, we have way more than we could ever possibly need. Sure our kids want things, but they don’t NEED anything more than what they have. I’m not trying to sound pompous or anything, so please don’t think that. We definitely struggle, and have learned to live on a pinch.
You see, I know that there are people out there who may have a home but are struggling to pay their bills or even get food. I also know people without homes at all to call their own. I have been in all of the listed situations myself before. When I moved here, I lived with my brother and his family before I got a job and on my feet. I have also had to utilize (and still sometimes do) the local food pantries. So, I can’t forget to be so very thankful for everything that I / we have. Bubs and I both work very hard for everything that we have, but that can easily change if one of us gets sick or hurt. So, even though there are people out there who have a lot more than we do, I have to remind myself not to turn green with envy. There are people with less.
Days of Gratitude
As mentioned, at the beginning of this year I wrote out 3 things I was grateful for every day. I am going to be doing this again in 2020. I’m not going to look back at my 2019 list while I’m writing out my 2020 list. I decided to do this because after January 2020 I want to see how they stack up to each other. What is the same, what is different?
I have so many things to be thankful for! I have survived so many things, I am blessed with a beautiful family, even friends who are so close they may as well be family. Also, simple everyday things that we may sometimes take for granted such as running water. There is no limit.
Goals for the New Decade
So, even though I have had many humbling moments, that doesn’t mean I don’t want things for myself and my family. There are lots of things I would like to be able to do, experiences I would love to provide my family with. Working from home full time is one of those things I would like to do, so that we could travel as a family. These are all things I have to work on and work towards.I have already started writing out my goals for the upcoming decade, and I will post them probably on New Years Eve, or New Years Day.
What I can say is this: Over the last couple of years I have really worked on myself. (Sorry if I sound repetitive) My biggest most absolute goal for myself this upcoming year, and every year after that is to keep working on myself. To never stop pushing myself for things that I truly believe in. To never settle. To never stop trying to be a better person. To never ever give up on myself.